Thursday, June 3, 2010

The impossibility of hope: part 2

p.s- For all new readers, this is the 2nd part of the tale published a few days back..please try the first part: http://ofblackandgrey.blogspot.in/2010/06/beach-of-calicut-is-timeless-beauty.html before you start with this one..



Near the shore, a young urchin was playing his flute, with the hope that some stranger would give him enough to buy a morsel, or at least a snack that he may call dinner. Baggy may have had many sour experiences in his life, but he was a noble man at heart. He felt his back pocket and though the wet purse was half empty, he remembered there were two hundred rupee notes kept carefully in a plastic pouch. The pouch he had kept, to return to his once beloved friend when Baggy would confront him, and the 200 rupees would settle all of his debts with the bastard. But the bastard had left with a little less than two lakhs, leaving the contents of the pouch as the last trinket of money in his tired hands.


He decided there was no need for a dead body in the ocean to carry cash for travel expenses and started walking back, freeing himself from the tentacles of death the water had twined around him, at least temporarily. The little musician was shocked at first, though soon shock gave way to gratitude. ”Sahib, If there is a god, he will bless you..” the urchin mumbled. With a pained smile, he turned around and once again began to walk.
This time, the very first step was interrupted by something distinctly soft and small hitting him on the back of his legs. He looked and he saw a child, a 2 year old, giggling feverishly even as she lay down after the collision a few seconds back. The child sprang up, with an unfathomable burst of energy that only children are gifted with. Once again, she giddily ran around our man Baggy and finally careened off in some direction. Exactly one and a half seconds later, a man wearing the same facial expression as the kid shot past him, chasing what was in all probability his child, while behind him a woman came smiling.

These trivial incidents would have made no impact on a casual bystander, but Baggy was no ordinary observer. He was a man who had given himself a death sentence and only some instants short of executing that order. In his mind, a transformation was taking place. The sheer energy of the entire encounter shook him. The cogs and wheels of his brains suddenly decided to turn in an unknown direction. The child, to him, was the embodiment of the true human spirit, unrestrained, untainted with the seeds of doubt that the society sows. No setback would hold it down, and if something, someone could bring it to its feet, the next instant it would soar high, laughing at the hurdles it just jumped over. He realized he ha been a fool to even contemplate throwing his life away. His life!! This was his only chance at this game, and he could come this far, nothing could stop him from reaching the touchline. With a wicked smile, he slipped his hands in to his shirts pocket.

The outdated phone in there may have been cheap, but as its manufacturers proudly declared, it was truly made for India. A little bath in the water had certainly not hampered its working, and on its screen, there was just one message, from an unknown number-
“sry.V had2. tk cre. ”
On another day, he would have broken into tears and mayhap thrown the phone away. But today, Bhagyesh Dev was an enlightened man. Walking past the sands, he stepped on to the sidewalk, typing away a short yet immensely measured reply. Smiling derisively, he stepped on to the roads, his eyes locked on to the send button.


Mohammed Shareef was a god fearing man. He did namaz five times a day, spoke with compassion to his fellow creatures and never touched liquor in his life. It was these qualities among lesser mortals that made him a mini hero in his village near the ancient sands of Kappad. Returning from a grueling road trip to the northern states on his sturdy, reliable truck, he had earned enough for the month. As his vehicle sped along, his thoughts wandered to his home where his family would have made him a delicious dinner and his eldest daughter would be there to welcome him back. His mind faltered for an instant, and he did not quite see the man in the middle of the road. It is queer how a single instant can change everything, make a living man with a beating heart into a bloody pulp, with nothing recognizable of the erstwhile Bhagyesh Dev, save the mobile flung from his arms the moment the truck took his life away, and his soul was returned, to whom it was offered and withdrawn sometime back.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

The impossibility of hope: part 1




The beach of Calicut is a timeless beauty, offering solace to the thousands of souls who seek its company every evening- lovers who want some moments in the salty breeze just to themselves, families who wish to escape the monotonical notes of the week that was by, grand old men reminiscing their more colourful days-she enthralls them all without any prejudice, any haughtiness. One among the thousands that day was Mr. Bhagyesh Dev. Lets call him Baggy, for that’s what he was known in his young years in college.

“Ah,college…”..Looking back, it seemed unreal, like vignettes from a stranger’s album, a glimpse into a life that will never return . He did not know it back then, but his college life would be the happiest periods in his life. Ever since he arrived there as a wide eyed first year, he gained much. The friendship of Rashid Umar a.k.a Razzie, the sworn enemy-hood of the thugs in the final year, and at the expense of a little spilt blood and some well planned coincidences, the love of his life, Rekha kamath. Then one fine day college was done, its gates closed to them forever, and the boys realized they were men now, men on the road. Without a job in hand, but with more than the usual foolhardiness that youth tends to inject to the brains of men, he bid adieu to his parents and married Rekha.

The flashback was cut short,as he felt the waves kissing his feet He watched the white waters from the shore retreat back, into the blue and in the distance the blue of the ocean met the sky. He had made his decision and nothing under the sun could persuade him to change it. He began his walk to oblivion, in to the dark depths of the ocean. The first step was the most difficult to take, and the rest came easy. The rhythm of the water matched the rhythm of his footsteps, and to his forlorn ears they were music- plaintive, poignant yet exquisite, for he was sure these would be the last notes that he would hear in this life. As the salty waters began lashing at his chest, it started to throb, however from within. Once again his thoughts drifted wantonly to his past.

The marriage was difficult from day one and the lack of blessings of mammon made matters all the more difficult. Then like a playful mid afternoon dream, Razzie popped out of nowhere, with money in his hands and ideas to die for. Together they started a business, which would “one day conquer the world”, according to Razzie. Once again there were smiles as our protagonist, Rekha and Razzie enjoyed many a day with old jokes, wisecracks and optimism about the future, some of those sunsets on this very shore. Rekha soon got a job, with some strings pulled at the right places and the uncertainties in their investments seemed somewhat mild.

Somewhere along the way, the journey started to become confusing and treacherous. Razzie would disappear on business trips to improve the worsening financial status of their brainchild and sometimes when he needed his wife’s support the most, more often than not, she would be supposedly lost in the quagmires of her job. Baggy was a little slow to put the pieces of the puzzle together, but when he did, no mistakes were made. His wife was cheating on him with his only friend. In a flurry of rage, he set out to confront them, only to learn that they had left a day earlier with whatever was left of his life’s savings.

The waves started caressing his face as he realized the end was near. With a few more steps, there would be no more sand under his feet and the steep incline underneath would ensure that his bones would rest in the sea bed. In the two thousand strong crowds that Friday evenings bring, not many would notice a man disappear in the sea, and certainly no one would be in time to rescue his damned soul. The evening sun was at its dying glory, filling the evening with a crimson radiance, as it sank slowly under the horizon. Bhagyesh Dev was nearly neck deep in the water and occasionally the waves would dance over his head, giving him a sad farewell. At that moment he looked back, not into his life, but at the shore behind, and what he saw changed his life, or what was left of it.

<..to be continued..>

Click here for Part two- http://ofblackandgrey.blogspot.mx/2010/06/impossibility-of-hope-part-2.html

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Winter rhymes


My love is cold,
The embers of a fire
frozen in time.
The flowers in my hand,
a dull grey,For colours are meant
for spring,much less for winter.
My kiss is the cold touch of mist
On her cheeks,
the warmth of the heart lost,
Left along the boulevards we walked.
Dreams,once wild and vivid,
now left just as frames,
in black and white.